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Wednesday, November 10, 2010

Thirty Days Gratitude ~ Day #10



Today I am thankful for the opportunity to serve others…..even though there are times I fail miserably.

At one time, I was extremely selfish over some things.  I perceived myself as a Christian, but I certainly didn’t act very Christ-like.  God used a set of circumstances to illustrate HIS forgiveness and HIS way of providing for HIS children.

My father-in-law and I got along in an “okay” manner.  I had some issues with the way he had and did treat his family.  Looking back now I can see he was merely a product of the way he had been raised.  His mother died when he was very young and his own father never demonstrated a very caring attitude.  This “learned” behavior had become a way of life for “A.C.”  (Maybe this is an example of the “generational curse” the Bible speaks of.)

Our second daughter was a few weeks old and my sister was visiting.  She (my sister) had recently lost a set of twins.  A.C. came over and he was drunk.  He often drank some, but I had never seen him drunk.  (I cannot stand to be around a drunk.  They’re no fun.)  Anyway, while there he picked up the baby and not paying attention he nearly dropped her.  My sister was close enough to grabbed his arm and the baby.  I was livid. 

A few weeks went by and we invited the in-laws over for dinner.  I was still upset.  I didn’t want to feed A.C., let alone feed him the best of what we had….it was still a week or two until payday. 

God really got a hold of my heart…..I was so ashamed….and I ended up cooking the best I had, which was also A.C.’s favorite meal.  I forgave my father-in-law.  He never drank around me or the grandkids again.  God was in the midst of the situation.

Over the years, I came to realize my selfishness had also been passed down from my mother.  Her mother died when she and my aunt where six and two years old.  The next few years were spent with aunts, away from their father who was working, and often there was not adequate food.  Then there was the depression.  Mom was a good woman in many ways, but she could be selfish and I had taken on her attitude about food and having enough.

Because of the experience with A.C., I learned to share whatever we had, with whoever God sent our way.  I began to overcome my "own baggage".

Sometimes, we have to be willing to change, in order that our heavenly Father can mold and shape us to be more Christ-like.  God always forgives and He always desires to give us HIS best.

9 comments:

  1. I love this post. I have often found that when I forgive somebody, I am the one who is the most blessed by it. Have a wonderful day.

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  2. Thanks for sharing such a personal glimpse into your heart. I think we all have to overcome in this area!

    Have a great day!
    ~H

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  3. This hits really close to home for me. Thanks for your insight on it definitely gives me something to think about. I really struggle in dealing with alcoholics and just wrote about my struggles with my father recently. Thanks so much!
    Jackie

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  4. Forgiveness is a mighty powerful thing.

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  5. i appreciate your open heart. pray for me as i try to minister to my family. the spirit of selfishness is rampant and so deep they are drowning in the sin....yet they are unaware. i love them so, but you can't save a person who thinks they are doing it all right! i pray that i am not blind to sin in my own heart, may God show me my needs for forgiveness & repentance.

    Bless you sister. You have helped me so much in the last few months. Thanksgiving is a meaningful holiday this year! praise God!

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  6. I am currently working on a post about my own selfishness. It's really been weighing heavy lately...and, yes, I know who put it there. I am just like you with the drunk thing--it's rampant in Hubs' family and right next door. I am fighting God right now about the ones next door...I always fight HIM and why I do not know because HE always wins! LOL So glad I read your post today!

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  7. Thanks for the reminders~Have a blessed day! hugs!

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  8. Thanks for sharing a part of you with all of us. Trials and tribulations. I agree that sometimes when we forgive someone, I am the one most blessed by the forgiveness. There is just peace in my heart. Thank you for insight.

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